Let's get personal, shall we



right side: i used to be sad
left side: now im not



I think sometimes, some people may use a blog to hide who they really are. this is unfortunate and sorry...but a misuse of a blog.  i'm not saying you need to; air your dirty laundry, list your social security number, name the prescriptions you take or leave your cell number. all i'm saying is...use a blog for the benefit of others gaining knowledge (and if you're lucky...) wisdom from personal experience, tragedy, trauma and life. 



i'm generally a happy person...generally.  ;)



9 miles! (with God this time...)



but i haven't always been. In fact there have been a few years where i was completely lost and very unsure of who i was, what i was doing and what good thing i had to offer anyone...including myself.  i think going through droughts like that can define you, your character, your courage, bravery, stupidity, what have you.  i think it can also carve out a new person, help you discover a new depth maybe you thought was lost in the thickness of that depth.  you will always be you...i will always be.......i.  but...a deeper person exists in all of us.  when we tap into that depth, that realization of who we really are, when we allow God to use us in the manner that He has intended for us to be used, nothing can get in our way.  I tried to live a pretty safe life. I didn't really venture out of my comfort zone, i didn't really want to try a challenge because of my own fear of failure.  Even, as crazy as this sounds, a fear of success! yes...that does exist. 

about a year ago i decided i wanted to run.  i thought, "If i can sit here and watch a 500 pound man run a mile without stopping, then i can."  So i did.  and have been for the last year, consistently. I have run without stopping (physically in 2 different ways). i did run that mile...then i ran miles. then i ran more miles. and kept running miles and miles away from God.   i stopped myself in time to realize i wasn't who i wanted to be. and more importantly, i wasn't who God had intended me to be. I was running away from it and from Him.



26.2 marathon...here i come!

 it didn't take long for me to fall into the mercy of His ways and understand that i'll never be too far gone from Him. I was the one running and turning my face away from Him...He wasn't.  He promises He won't. and He's never let me down...only i have. 

I used to be sad and searching. Now, i'm happily waiting and plodding along in the path that has been laid out for me. sometimes it feels like a nice walk on a winding path, other times it feels like a 9 mile trek up and down hills.  all i have to do is keep walking (or running) in the path that He has laid out for me.
I used to be sad and unsure.  Now i'm happy and ready to face the new things that are in store.  i used to not really care. now every day is a chance. 
live life on purpose i say! live on purpose.