God burnt my bacon

well...if we're gonna be completely honest...
...i burnt it. i was cooking it. but God got in my way of cooking those little sizzlin' strips of pig.  as i stood over the grease-flailing pan of bacon, a smile crept onto my face. not because i had made it past 5 minutes of cooking bacon without being sprayed with hot grease, but because i was happy.  i was listening to some newly-purchased songs via an iTunes card. i don't even remember what song i was listening to. all i can be sure of is that there is a right way to Dougie and an Erica way to Dougie.  i two-stepped to the latter.  neck twitch, fist pump, mild hip action, lip sync, flip bacon.  begin again.  i got carried away with my newly found relationship to the hardwood floor in the kitchen. 

maybe some [religious] people think it's insane that i met God in such an unconventional way...doo-wopping in my kitchen, over a pan of hot bacon. but im telling you, He burnt that first batch.  as i heaved the crispy slices into the trash, i laughed. first because im usually not such a bad culinary student. second because God also ruined the bag of buttered noodles i was supposed to finish cooking for my dad for his dinner...oops!

you're supposed to boil the water and the butter first. then add the noodles. he ate bratwursts in buns and noodles thru a straw. (ok not really...) he ate them though! and im not mad that i entertained my inner hip hopper.  dancing is a great way to burn calories  ;)  i got distracted. by God.  in an unconventional way.  dancing in my kitchen. over a pan of bacon. with an oven mit on my hand.