Sometimes...my job is frustrating. Sometimes...I feel like my job really isn't a job at all. Other than swiping my ID badge and getting a paycheck every 2 weeks...I feel rather useless. Don't get me wrong...I'm EXTREMELY grateful that I have a job. Very blessed even to have one. And to have one that pays well. This is what I'm trying to get across; i want to impact.
And someone strung out on drugs or suffering from dimentia is is not gonna be impacted by me...unless i bring them a sandwhich or the nurse to bring pain pills. I guess I'm beginning to feel the onset of restlessness. I just can't stay out for too long. And that bugs me! And whether it's because I'm supposed to consider moving on or it's just bc I'm not settled in a place where God wants me to stay settles...either way, it's still hard. Yea I'm ONLY 24...and yea I have my whole life ahead of me. Does that give me the the liberty to experiment? To move around? To dream? To set goals and aggressively pursue them? Or am I just supposed to stay put for awhile? I'm not sure. Not even close. Am I supposed to know what I'm destined to do? Or am I supposed to jump around like frogger trying to find where I belong? Who knows??
God knows. But I have a hunch He's not into the whole giving away the end of the story business. The patient I'm with tonight is having hip surgery tomorrow. He just got some pain meds. Looks like he's finally down for the count. Leaving me to sit and ponder what God is thinking now. I wonder if He will enlighten me?
I shall hope so.
